 
 Photography is my passion. I hate being screwed over.
"Wanna know who your true friends are? Fuck up and see who's still there for you. icon : violetbirdy |
Wednesday, August 25, 2010 @ 5:40 PM |
comment (0) I want you to fucking choose me. You don't know how much I want you. I wish I had the courage to say this to you, not just on a blog. Maybe it's not the time to start things, but I'm waiting for the right time, which is probably 2 years from now. That's when I can tell my family, and stop hiding things from them...especially about relationships, but I wonder...if you would ever do the same for me? My mind and heart...i don't know if it's confusing me or not. Do you like someone else? Do you? Please show me a sign...because I don't want be hurt like this. I'm not afraid to love, but what I'm afraid of is that, I'd be hurt the same way as before. I don't know why I'm crying - THIS SHOWS HOW MUCH I WANT YOU! I DON'T WANT ANYONE ELSE TO BE WITH YOU! I WANT TO SAY THIS TO YOU SO MUCH, SO MUCH THAT I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU, ANYTHING TO WIN YOUR HEART BACK AGAIN! I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF I'M BEING SELFISH OR NOT. YOU WERE THE ONE THAT MADE ME FEEL WHOLE. I WOULD LOVE TO GO BACK FRO THAT DAY WHERE SOMETHING HAD FUCKED UP. I felt as thought back then, we were like souldmates, though we had minor arguments, but that's okay with me. I want to break free, to be able to walk up to you and tell you how I feel about you. But now's not the time. I know the time's not right yet. I want to wait, because I know, I know that I will be more confident when we're both out of school, you'll be first to leave - now that's the scary part.. You know why it's scary? Because I'm scared that once you've leave high school, you will find someone out there...you wouldn't know how heartbreaking it would to know that you would be with someone else. But I will fight for you, I can't always depend on you. I need to stand up for myself, and be strong. I want to be independent. Right now, I hope that we stay in touch, though we don't talk as much, but I will try my best. ________, you are the one I want to spend my life forever and ever. If you do not feel the same way, I understand - I understand that you've moved on and does not want to rewind back to that day. As long as you're happy, than, I'm happy too. But, I still want you. I adore your eyes, your smile, your cute dimples, everything. To me, in my eyes, you are perfect for me. I don't care what others would say about you. It's my choice, and not theirs. If they're willing to support me, then yes, I'm fine with it. It's going to killme how I won't be able to peek on you this year and the following years. You'll be graduating year 12 in exactly 3 MORE WEEKS - I can't believe time has passed by. I'm probably going to cry my freaking eyes out..I'm so so so glad to have met you, and it's all thanks to _______. Without her, I wouldn't have been able to meet someone as amazing as you. I hope to see you again once you have graduated high school. I hope you are glad to meet me too. But, if you choose to not give it a second time round, I guess it's fine, I mean it wouldn't ruin our friendship right? Though, I would be sad.... |
